The Guy's Girl

I will be the first person to admit that I was a typical girl in high school. I said on a regular basis that I was a guy's girl, and that girls hated me for no reason. I was fully convinced that I was “one of the guys,” while also being the girl they all wanted. I loved the attention, however I didn't fully understand what I was saying. I have heard almost every teenage girl I've known describe themselves as a guy's girl. I think many young women push themselves to be whoever guys would want to hang out with. Thank God I have learned a thing or two since then.

Girls: it's OKAY to be a girl. It's okay to like dressing up, shopping, shoes, and chick flicks. It's okay to be emotional sometimes, and to do makeup and like cats. Don't force yourself to like things that you don't like. It's also okay to be adventurous and to try new things. You never know what you might enjoy. I, for one, enjoy archery, 4-wheeling, camping, snowshoeing, and shooting. But I also know that I love shopping, reading, doing my makeup, wearing high heels and dresses, and watching chick flicks. That's okay too. It's also okay for you to not like doing certain things. I don't like skiing or talking about my many bodily functions, and that's okay. Be you. You can't find a guy who likes you for you if you aren't being you.

It's also vitally important to form and maintain very close friendships with other women. Yes, it's incredibly challenging. However, when you are in a committed relationship with a man (or woman) in the future, your friendships with other women are the ones that will remain important. They are also the friendships that will matter the most in the long run.

Alright, last of all, please just stop claiming you are a guy's girl. It's quite frankly annoying to all women, and a turn-off for most men. Guys want a woman they can hang out with, but make no doubt, they also want a woman. They don't like competing for your attention, or feeling jealous either. It's just unnecessary.

Forgive me for my rant. I understand that no one is going to read this, and quite frankly I don't care. Just advertising my opinions, since this is the internet, and that's what we do here.

10 things I would tell my 16 year old self if I could

So I was on Pinterest today (let's be honest, I'm always on Pinterest), and I found a list of things to blog about. It's from #20in13. I'll post the link the next time I have it up on my computer, but it's easier said than done on my phone. So even though no one reads this, here goes. 

10 Things I Would Tell My 16-Year-Old Self if I Could:

1: Treat mom better. She doesn't deserve to be lied to. She doesn't deserve those eye rolls, or the attitude. To be honest, you don't deserve such a good mom. That being said, don't let her feelings control your life. You can't control how she feels. Be nice about it, but also be yourself. 

2: Don't be so quick to judge others. You don't know where they've been until you've been there yourself, and even if you have been there yourself, you aren't them.  Keep the empathy you were blessed with. 

3: Learn to listen. Just shut up sometimes. Don't get overwhelmed by the drama, but not everyone wants to hear about you all of the time. 

4: Be yourself. Be confident with who you are and how you look. You cannot possibly look like anyone else (expensive Michael Jackson surgeries aside), so be comfortable with who you are. Find your good side, and rock it. Learn to use makeup to highlight your good features. Spend a little extra on a good pair of genes, or nice underwear. Make yourself feel good and pretty, because you are. 

5: Eat the pizza. Drink the soda. You're young. Do t whole it doesn't make a difference. 

6:  Play with your family. Spend more quality time with them. In the end, it's your family that will always be there for you. So play cards. Play bored games. Talk to your sisters. Play with your brother. Read to him.  Go to the park. Go for a walk. Build the relationships that will last, and will matter.

7:  Realize that you're ignorant. Seek out to know more. Try harder in school. Stick it through college. It's important. 

8:  I know you get depressed. You'll get through it. Be strong. Life gets better. It also gets a lot worse. You know the old adage; what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Push yourself to be happy.

9:  Be uncomfortable. Force yourself to do things that you wouldn't normally do. That's how you improve yourself.  That's how you make good memories. 

10:  Get to know the people around you. Especially your elders. They have some amazing stories. Have patience with people. Have patience with your family.  Have patience with becoming an adult. You'll grow up too fast anyway. You'll miss this. Enjoy it while it lasts. 

My venue and stuff.

So after searching and visiting many a venue, I think we have finally found the one. One of my friends had her wedding there about a year ago. Is it tacky to use the same place? Anyway, it's Lone Hawk Farm in Longmont. It's closer to home, and it's perfect for us! I didn't take any pictures of this one, but here are some from a Google image search. 

See? Sooo perfect! And here are the pictures of the first one I was considering in Loveland. The fact that it's in Loveland, the "kitchen" was gross, there was no air conditioning, no shade, and the barn was way too tiny for what we would need.  And the bathrooms were port-o-potties. 

Osborn farm was so cute, but there were just too many downsides. 

Here was my day yesterday. 

Dog poop. Yep. Gross. I spent an hour cleaning the cushions. I can't even tell you how mad I was at my stupid dog. 

These are my 4th of July nails. It was a great independence day. Travis and I went to Loveland Lake for fireworks, and they were AMAZING! It was a good night. 

Squirt had surgery on the first to get her tumor removed. Everything went fine, and she was up on crutches the next day. It was an easy surgery. She's not in any pain, and she'll probably only be on crutches till Tuesday, when the stitches get removed. 

Here is my new haircut (curly and then straight) 

Aaannnnddd.... I suppose that's it for now. I'll update you all on more stuff later. :) love ya!

1 week poo-free

Ok, so it's been a little more than a week, but the pictures are from the one week mark. So I may have jumped the gun on how nice it felt. A lot. It's been very dry and weird feeling. But I've already noticed a huge difference in how much less greasy my hair has felt. I've already skipped washing my hair twice. I did stop using the vinegar rinse. My mom reminded me that vinegar makes your hair darker, especially with the sun, so I went back to using conditioner, which helped a lot with the dryness. It's taking some getting used to, but I'm sticking to it! At least it doesn't look dirty!

Stop, drop, and listen

So I have the unique experience of being only ten years older than my almost thirteen-year-old step daughter. Even so, I was having a really hard time connections with her, and there was almost a sense of animosity between us for a little while. Some of this has to do with issues we have been facing with her mother, which is totally unfair to her, I know, but luckily I recently re-read all of my journals. Here is what I wrote to my future self, without even knowing it.

I told myself that I needed to stop pushing my thoughts and opinions on my pre-teen and teenagers. I needed to drop my hurt feelings, and drop my opinions, and shut up. I needed to stop talking, drop what I wanted to say, and just listen. I know, you get it. But seriously, this was a major big thing to me. So after realizing that most of my talks with Brieanna had been me talking at her and lecturing her, I decided to try shutting up for once.

And guess what? It worked. She actually wants to tell me stuff! She is spilling out gossip and secrets and telling me about her day on her own! It took a little bit of prodding at first, but she told me about her first boyfriend before she told her mom or dad, and even before he asked her out. She tells me about her friends, what they do together and talk about, and how she feels about things going on in her life. It's amazing, and I love it! 

It isn't quite working for Dylan, but he's a boy, and I'm not quite sure that talking about feelings is something any boy really does.

Anyway, so my advice for mothers of teenage girls is to try it. Stop, drop, and listen. It's harder than you think, but well worth the effort. 

No Poo!

Ok blogosphere. Here goes nothing. I've read up on the no-poo (no shampoo/conditioner) know-how, and the blogs I've read have me convinced to try it. So today begins my adventures in a poo-free world. I decided to lather up with straight baking soda (not watered down), and to condition with watered down white vinegar. I just took my first poo-free shower, and here are my thoughts.

It felt kind of grainy at first, not slimy like I had read about. I assume that's because I flat out was rubbing dry baking soda on my dampened hair. I rubbed it all over my scalp, and let it sit while I washed and shaved the rest of my body. When I rinsed it out, I defiantly felt the sliminess a little more, and my hair actually squeaked a little bit. Than I sprayed the water/vinegar on the ends of my hair, waited a minute, and rinsed. 

It was a bit more difficult to brush, but over all, not too bad. I added a little spray of perfume to my hairbrush, because the vinegar kind of scared me a little. It already feels so silky, and it hasn't even dried yet! I've read about a transitional period for your hair, so I won't be too surprised when it happens, but for now, I already am excited about the results. Wish me luck!

I'm engaged!

So it finally happened. He proposed. :) I can't tell you how happy and excited I am to be his wife. So I have begun the planning. And I already have advice. Go figure. Haha!

So for our wedding, I'm hoping for a rustic barn sort of theme. I have been looking everywhere for a cheap barn to rent out that didn't have a million requirements. I have run into several issues, such as you have to be done by nine, you have to use our caterers, you need to hire a bar tender for a champaign toast, etc. Oy! So my advice is to be very particular in your google search, and to use more than one search engine. I started out looking for barn venues in Colorado. There were very few results, and the ones I found were pricy. Barn weddings in Colorado produced a similar result. Although the venues were nice, they were expensive and about an hour or more away. Yuck. So I finally looked up farm wedding in northern Colorado (I also specified: Longmont, Loveland, Boulder, Greely, and Fort Collins). Ding, ding, ding! Finally I found some decent locations! I did use google a lot, but I would recommend using another search engine as well to get more results.

I ran into a lot of great ideas for my wedding along the way though. One woman decided that instead of renting out flatware, silverware, and glassware, she would go to thrift stores and estate sales to collect an assortment of china to give it an antique rustic and eclectic feel. I loved the look, so I've just begun my collection of plates.

I have already gone wedding dress shopping once with my best friend (she was moving to New York the following week, so we decided to go before she left), and although it was a lot of fun, and I found a dress I LOVE, I would suggest visiting more than one store, and not buying the first dress you love until you have tried on several. I haven't bought a dress yet, partially because I don't have the money saved for one yet, and partially because my mom and sisters weren't there to see it, and I'm glad I didn't. If I bought a dress this soon I'd probably have major buyer's remorse right now. I will take my time and visit another shop or two before I decide. I have plenty of time.

I am sorry to say that I'm finding my stress is coming mostly from my mother who is trying to pressure me into doing a wedding in mid August of this year. That's about 5 months away, and we have NO money for a wedding, as we just purchased a home. My mom is convinced that $2000 is more than enough for a perfect wedding. I think her misconceptions come from the fact that she is Mormon and is used to temple weddings and church hall receptions, both free. I do understand her point of view in other ways. My sister and her husband are moving to Washington at the end of the summer for school. But there are so many other issues. The vacation schedule for this summer is full, most wedding venues are booked, it's practically impossible for us to get time off work, and we don't have the money for a wedding or a honeymoon. It's just getting too sticky for my liking.

That being said, I am very lucky to be able to save money in ways that others aren't. My dad is hopefully going to take care of the cooking, so we only need to take care of the cost of the food. My wedding gift from one of my "other moms" is a wedding cake, and yet another gift from one of my "other moms" is alterations for my dress. I have several family friends that will give me discounts on photography, and one might even do it for me for free. I also know someone who's a dj, and someone who is a professional decorator and already owns a lot of the rustic type decorations I want, and she'll do it all for a reasonable price. Chairs and tables are available for free from my parent's church, and we know plenty of people with trucks. So I feel very lucky to have a lot of stuff already taken care of. Thanks in advance to all of those willing to help!

Last but not least, I am trying to keep this fun and easy. I don't want it to be a stressful, hectic, and frustrating experience. I want to have fun and enjoy my wedding.

Thanks for reading!